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Day 6 – Monday, November 23, 2009

 

Gotchya Day

 

Well, we were prepared for the worst possible outcome for today.  You hear all kinds of stories about how people just have a crying baby tossed at them and that is it- no opportunity to ask any questions or anything.  Also, often the babies are in terrible condition under their 20 layers of clothes – so we were fully expecting this.  Our group had a wide array of kids, ages, and experiences.  Some did have the baby handed over by people with no answers to any questions they might have.  Some were not in the best condition at all.  All of there were in at least 4 layers of clothes.  For the most part the babies seemed to be in decent health, though most of them also seem to have a cold of varying degrees. 

 

We were the ones who got the 'storybook' Gotchya Day.  Four caretakers were with Ying to help transition her.  They recognized us right away from our picture books and they brought her over to us.  They were very excited and happy.  They were just plain wonderful.  She was in many layers of clothes, so all you could see was her face – and it looked exactly like my little doll from her pictures.  I can never be thankful enough to realize that she has been loved and cared for while with these people.  You could absolutely tell that they loved her very much.  I was fine until a couple of them started tearing up, then my eyes got teary as well.  I can't imagine being in their shoes and how very hard that must be.  They are truly special people to do what they do.  Even the director was very attached to Ying, unusual for Chinese men I believe, to show something like that.  You could tell they had been showing her our pictures and she knew that I was Mama.  They were so wonderful, they brought us two bags full of things to help take care of her – clothes, tissues, wipes, diapers, handmade clothes, her blanket, toys, snacks.  It was extremely overwhelming, considering most only got the clothes on their kids' back.  Also considering how little these people have to give. 

 

These were her actual daily caregivers.  Ying is the first foreign adoption from PingDingShan.  I hope they will adopt more out if this is how well all the kids are treated there- they have a wonderful program going.  One of the caretakers spoke very good English and told us that Ying has actually been in a care home in Beijing because of her special needs since she was 3 months old, but her orphanage paid for it.  They took the train from there to bring her to us.  They also said they had taken her to see some of the sights and would email us the pictures from there.   They gave us a wonderful letter from them that will mean a lot to her when she is older, and also a picture book of all her caretakers and friends from the orphanage.  It was the sweetest thing in the world.  They were upset about leaving her and hid in the hallway for quite a while to watch her as she adjusted to us.  She was just fine with us, and I think she prefers Daddy.  I truly could never thank these people enough for loving her, and I know they must be missing her terribly.  That is a wonderful gift to give to a child. 

 

Ying fell asleep on my shoulder on the bus, and for the most part has been quite good.  She doesn't say many words, probably due to the pallet, but she understands quite a bit and communicates with her hands.  Other families in our group have had an easy transition, and some have been rough.  One baby they knew was a cryer- and she has been crying, though I'm told adjusting well when she is in the hotel room with her family.  One lady's mother passed away the night before we got our babies.  One of the babies had information from the foster family and a note for the baby wrapped up and hidden in her pacifier that was under her many layers of clothes (this is frowned upon by the CCAA I understand), one set of people have a 'blue baby' who is in very serious condition and I don't believe they are going to be allowed to adopt her.  They could use some prayers.  The 'blue baby' syndrome is often cause by the same heart condition Ying had that was operated on and fixed (tetralogy of fallot).  They baby and her appearance worries me so much - she was literally clue and listless.  They had her taken to the hospital late this evening and given oxygen and other medication that seemed to help, but the cardiologists do not believe she will make the flight home.  They are definitely on my mind and I feel guilty about how well and how smoothly things have gone for us. 

 

Ying cried herself to sleep on my shoulder the 1^st night.  She was grieving, sounding as if her little heart was breaking.  I'm sure she was missing her family and friends.  I'm glad she was upset in a way, I would have been more worried if she had not shown any signs of grief.  I am certain that there were a few Chinese people crying their eyes out and missing her as well.  =(  Once she was done crying, she slept very well.  I said a lot of thankful prayers as I was falling asleep.  We really, truly could not have asked for a better day, I don't think I could have imagined a better outcome for this day. 

 

 

Day 7 – Tuesday, November 24, 2009

 

Today we woke up and took all the kids out to do paperwork.  Ying is the cutest little thing, and she is such a girl compared to her big brother!  She seems to be very little delayed mentally – other than the speech issue.  She understands everything it seems.  She's adorable when she nods her head yes if you ask her something that she wants.  She points quite well too, I don't think it will take her long to catch up in English and in speaking, and also physically.  She really was very well cared for!  She knows many of her body parts (in Chinese) and likes to play little games.  She's just plain adorable.  She was very good while we did paperwork too, much more sedate than Matt.  We'll see if that lasts.  Our first stop was back at the same place we picked the kids up from yesterday… which – if I were one of the older kids- would have been really scary to me!  One of the families had Yisha explain to their little girl (who is 9) that we were going back, but just to do paperwork- they weren't giving her back or anything like that.  We actually had a little ceremony with the new director of the place – which was an honor to us.  Lily and Josh (the founders of CCAI- our adoption agency) paid us a visit as well – also a rare occurrence.  This is the largest group to adopt from Henan since they started the Henan project and everything is going wonderfully.  Lily went with us to the ceremony with the new director.  Josh stayed behind to help the family with the tet baby who was in the hospital.  Really, they couldn't have had a better advocate, it is fortunate for them that he is here, even though they are in a terrible position. 

 

We filled things out and got our certificate with our family picture on it, then went to fill our more paperwork.  The notary office was really interesting and very Chinese.  We had to trek up 8 flights of stairs, and through smoky hallways to get to the notary office.  They smoke a lot in China, even in the workplace.  After a minute or two, you get used to it.  They took more pictures and had us fill out more papers.  Then finally back to the bus to go to the hotel.  Then back out for a shopping trip…  to a store very similar to Wal-Mart (but not walmart, we went there the night before)… it was weird to have all the Chinese people staring and taking pictures with their camera phones.  It was also weird wandering around the store trying to find the things you were looking for.  Then back on the bus again…  Ying started crying and fussing.  It makes me happy to hear her do that (bad as that sounds).  She was tired and thirsty.  We gave her some water and snacks and she was good to go.  She's very cute when she cries.  She bucks, just like Matt does, and I had to laugh.  I told her I had a 2.5 year old at home who was much bigger and probably 4 times stronger than her, so she could buck around all she wanted!  It is weird how delicate and gentle-natured she is compared to Matthew.  He's going to get such a kick out of playing with her I think.  We saw the baby who was in the hospital back at the hotel, she looked much better and was moving around and stuff.  That was encouraging.  They were waiting for their cardiologist at home to review her files.  I do not think they will end up being allowed to adopt her though, I don't know.  It is such a scary situation for them and they could definitely use prayers.  The baby is much worse then they thought she was.  I think I say a prayer every few minutes I'm so thankful that things are going so well for us.  YingYing was good in the restaurant for dinner, or was that lunch (yes, Chinese food again… we did eat Italian the night before we got her, but I wasn't hungry and didn't really eat any).  We came back to the room and played and took nice steamy bath (she loves baths, just like GeGe!)  and I was fully expecting another crying spell.  She was fine though, we put her down and said good-night.  She looked at books for a few minutes and went to sleep.  She is afraid of the dark though, so we have to make sure we leave a light on.  We will have to buy one for her room I think. 

 

I'll have Jason post more pictures when he wakes up and tells me where the cable is.  =)